Monday, October 13, 2008

Complexion (non) sense

Indians do not like dark skin.

Funny isn't it since we are dark skinned. Duh. Actually, no, it isn't funny. We discriminate against people with dark skin. We discriminate against ourselves and every race that's darker. Why? Because we consider it ugly. Dark skinned woman still find it hard to find a man (in an arranged marriage scenario) and if your skin is truly dark, as in chocolate brown, forget it. Might as well be branded un-salable in the marriage meat market.

The issue of skin color (not as a race issue but as a cosmetic thing) was something I had forgotten about after being in the US for so many years. Many a time when I meet a new person of Indian origin for the first time, they always find a way to say something that makes me cringe. It might be something utterly personal and none of their business which is irritating but harmless like "Why is your stomach sticking out? Getting fat, are you?" But often it's something discriminatory about dark skin either something utterly rude such as "Oh your son is fair like your husband and not taken after your father. Good thing." Or worse, something racist about people whose skins are a shade darker than ours. I hate being an Indian then. Am ashamed of it. Just HATE it. It's unbearable that instead of standing up for people of another minority, we discriminate. Based on what? Pigment? That we have an abundance of too.

I recall being criticized by a relative on the eve of my wedding for becoming too dark after going to America since America was the place people went to and became "fair". I like my color, love it, I wanted to yell at her but my brother kept my mouth sealed since that would've been rude. It makes me cringe when people (Indians) say, "Oh she is nice looking, but so dark." Men can get away with the color bar unless of course they're too dark. then all bets are off for them too.

The whole issue of color only returned to mind because my dad mentioned an Indian TV debate on which a prominent journalist was discussing this whole color controversy in India. I cannot think of anything less significant to discuss. I am glad they're talking about it and dealing with it but disgusted at the same time that this inane rubbish warrants a discussion of debatable proportions.

There was an Indian ad on You tube I found that left me speechless. A prominent Bollywood actor Saif Khan is rejecting a girl based on her color and hooks up with a fairer gal. Now this is a series of ads where the next ad or two show how this dark girl starts using the infamous 'fair and lovely' cream and becomes fair enough for him to notice her and thus go back to her. I wanted to throw up. What the hell! This is what the youth in India believes, thinks about, does? Then there was another ad where yet another Bollywood heartthrob Shahrukh Khan (who is dark himself so go figure) advises a man who is dark to use "fair and handsome" (I am gagging as I write this) and thus win the girl since he's otherwise the laughing stock of the town.

My father grew up suffering massive insecurity for his dark complexion compared to his brothers. It makes me cry sometimes that even today, at 72 he says he is too dark to be good looking. He is one of the handsomest men I have seen. Where do you think my looks come from ;-)

But here's an eye opener. I mentioned this whole color obsession to my friend (who's white) and how my in-laws thought I was too dark for their son. And she said, "Sorry Ranjini but to me your colors are exactly the same." Gives one pause, doesn't it? This subtle difference in shades of brown that all the Indians make such a hoo haa about is all just, well, brown to a Caucasian.

Then here's the biggest eye opener, one that I experienced several years ago as a teenager. I had a patch on my forehead that had lost pigment (vitiligo was the condition). The doctor (who had studied this, at the time, revolutionary treatment from the Swiss) took some skin from my forearm and added a solvent to it. The solvent dissolved the skin and all that remained in the test tube was pigment which he would inject into my forehead.

And what do you think the color of the pigment was?

Black. Pitch black.

I was surprised and asked him, "Why isn't it brown like my skin? He said everyone's pigment is black. All that differs is its concentration on one's skin. How far apart each cell of pigment is, is what determines one's "final" color, if you will.

There you have it. Underneath it all, everyone is as black as the night. Everyone's color is exactly the same.

Try rubbing some fairness cream on that Shahrukh.

4 comments:

Closed World said...

Ah, the color debate continues...Its an obsession that will never go away. By the way I have always wanted dark brown but flawless skin and bouncy curly hair! But look what I got: patchy fair skin and limp wavy hair!

Kartik said...

It is heartbreaking when you hear of people who look at the color of their skin as something that needs to be "overcome". Thanks for writing about this.

Anonymous said...

Hey man interesting article. Infact Ill be honest, I mean aren't Indian top male models... and actors dark.. infact we have people calling others dark, people who might be even a shade darker than them.. I have heard remarks like this all my life, though without sounding pompous- I am good looking,and intelligent, so when people can't find any flaws in you, they attack you based on your skin colour , thus showing their insecurity. I have realised that. And yeah, to white people, all of us have the same colour!!! Its annoying... but as Jesus said- forgive them for they know not what they do, or in this case.. what they say!!! nice article... keep going!!

Ayesha Ahmed said...

Nice to meet you today at the local library. Here is the link I talked of:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/jennybagel/they-pretend-to-be-us-while-pretending-we-dont-exist#.idaq2kdZx

Would love to hear your thoughts on your blog.